Planning a wedding is a learning process. Budget, I think, is one of the sharpest learning curves for a lot of people (why does everything cost way more than it should?). Since I’ve been on this crazy planning journey since January of 2012, I’ve learned some things along the way that may or may not be helpful for those just beginning this journey (or may be helpful to the non-primary-planning partner?).
Lesson 1: Weddings are expensive.
Yikes. This was the first thing we learned and it’s the one that still smarts the worst. There are plenty of ways to keep costs down, for sure, but I have not once heard anyone say “oh, that (wedding thing) was cheap!” Put wedding/bride/etc. before or after another word and you can automatically charge more for it.
Lesson 2: Getting a special perfume for the wedding day is totally a thing.
Lesson 3: People are nuts for chiavari chairs.
I tried explaining this one to Sparky and he just shook his head. “They’re nice and everything but they’re just chairs!” I couldn’t help but agree BUT with that being said: chiavari chairs were included with our rental. I may have understood the obsession a little bit better if we hadn’t gotten them automatically.
Lesson 4: Weddings involve complicated and strange etiquette.
As an example: it’s rude to mention registries (as a guest, I’ve always found this helpful), don’t put the address of the venue on the invitation (whoops), it’s poor form to bring gifts to weddings (apparently you’re supposed to send them before/after the wedding so as not to burden the bride/groom), and on and on.
Lesson 5: Weddings bring out the crazy in people.
Be you a bridezilla, guestzilla, fam-zilla, whatever. Somewhere, somehow, SOME crazy will infiltrate yourself into the wedding. Case in point: how many times were you asked on or near the day you got engaged “OH MY GAWD! WHEN IS THE WEDDING?” I mean, we’re pretty on top of it and had an idea of when it would be by the end of our engagement night but even that wasn’t set in stone for almost a month. (Fun fact: our original wedding date, picked back in January 2012, turned out to be Yom Kippur. We changed it mighty quick.)
Lesson 6: “White”
Diamond white. Antique white. Off-white. Ivory. Seashell. Cream. Bridal white.
Or how about: sapphire, cobalt, royal blue, blue, sea blue, cerulean, etc. (All of these were actual names for colors that turned out to be, for all intents and purposes, the same).
Moral of the story: colors are different and everyone wants to call them different things. Through trial and error, you’ll find colors you want (or won’t). Don’t give up if you think it doesn’t exist in your dream color(s) – just keep an open mind and get creative with naming.
This is just a sampling of the things I learned. What have you learned during the wedding planning process?